Child teased for glasses or an eye patch: what helps

Key takeaways

Teasing matters because treatment only works while it is used. A child who hides the glasses or pulls off the patch is not getting the treatment, so tell the eye doctor early.
In a UK study of 6,536 children, those in glasses or with a patch history were 35% to 37% more likely to be bullied. It shows an association in a group, and it does not mean your child will be bullied.
In a study of children treated for lazy eye, social acceptance scores were lower than in other children, and the lower scores went with patching, not with glasses or a squint.
Practical steps help: a short sentence your child can say, a word with the class teacher, a frame or patch your child chooses, and a seat where the board is clear.
The eye doctor can often adjust the plan or bring the next review forward. No treatment, surgery included, can be promised to end teasing.

The glasses are on, or the patch is on, and then a classmate says something. Your child comes home quiet, and the next morning the glasses are "lost" or the patch will not stay on. It is one point at which treatment can slip, and it is a fair thing to worry about.

This page sets out what the research says about teasing and eye treatment, what you can say at home and at school, how frames and patch designs can help, and when the eye doctor can change the plan. It makes one promise only: you do not have to sort this out alone, and the doctor wants to hear about it.

Why does teasing matter for my child's eye treatment?

Because treatment only works while it is used. Glasses help a child see, can help straighten an eye that turns, and are part of treating lazy eye (amblyopia). A patch works by making the brain use the weaker eye. If a child hides the glasses or pulls off the patch to avoid comments, the treatment stops, however good the plan was on paper.

AAPOS, the American association of paediatric eye doctors, notes that many children do not like the patch at first and that persistence and encouragement from the family help. A child who is also being teased needs more than encouragement. The action: if your child suddenly resists the glasses or patch, ask gently whether something happened at school before you assume it is stubbornness.

What do the studies show about teasing and bullying?

Children in glasses or with a patch history are more likely to report being bullied, but the studies show an association and not a certainty. In a UK birth cohort of 6,536 children, those wearing glasses at 7.5 years, or who had worn an eye patch, were 35% to 37% more likely to be victims of physical or verbal bullying at 8.5 years. The researchers adjusted for social class and maternal education, and boys and girls were affected alike (Horwood and colleagues, 2005).

A second study looked at how children feel. In Australia, 47 children aged about 9 who had been treated for amblyopia scored lower on social acceptance than 52 children of the same age who had not. Their scores for schoolwork, sport, appearance and overall self-worth were similar to the other children. Within the treated group, the lower social acceptance score went with a history of patching, and not with glasses or with a squint (Webber and colleagues, 2008).

These are group findings, from other countries, and they cannot say how your child will be treated. They do show that the worry is real and not just a parent's imagination. A third study, interviews with parents of children with a squint that comes and goes, found that fear of bullying shaped their treatment decisions, with concern about the eyesight playing a smaller part (Lecouturier and colleagues, 2015). If that is what you feel, it is worth saying so to the doctor.

What can I say to my child when classmates tease?

Start by listening before you fix anything. Ask what was said, who said it and how it felt. Then give your child words to use. A short, calm reply works better than a long explanation: "These help me see," or "It is my eye medicine."

Keep your own attitude matter-of-fact. AAPOS advises parents to stay positive about glasses, and suggests picture books about children who wear glasses and seeing family members wear theirs comfortably. For a patch, the same idea applies: it is a job the eye is doing, not a punishment. Helping your child wear the patch and glasses a toddler will keep on go through the everyday routines.

Praise the effort, not the look: "You wore them all day, even when it was hard." Do not promise that the teasing will stop. Promise that you will help if it does not. The action: pick one sentence your child can say, and rehearse it twice this week.

Should I tell the school, and what do I ask the teacher?

Yes, usually. Tell the class teacher before or just after treatment starts, and ask for a few small things. AAPOS notes that school is often a good time for patching, because teachers can help, and that when everyone understands why the child wears a patch it should not be a problem. Some children may need to sit nearer the front.

A short note works well. Say which treatment it is, how many hours a day it matters, and what you would like: a reminder to put the patch or glasses back on, a seat where the board is clear, and a quiet word with the class about eyes and why some children need help. Ask the teacher to tell you if teasing happens, so you hear it from an adult and not only from your child.

If the teasing continues after the teacher has stepped in, raise it with the school again and ask what the school's anti-bullying steps are. Keep the eye doctor in the loop, because a plan that is failing at school is something they would want to know. The action: write three lines to the teacher this week, covering what, how long and what help you are asking for.

Can frames and patch designs make it easier?

They can make it easier for the child to say yes. Let your child choose between two or three frames that the optical shop can fit well. A frame the child likes is more likely to be worn, and a poor fit is a reason to take them off. AAPOS stresses a comfortable frame with each eye centred behind the lens, and a strap or silicone tips if glasses slip. Your child's first glasses at the optical shop explains what to ask for.

For patching, choice matters too. Adhesive patches and cloth patches both exist, and the doctor can say which suits the plan. AAPOS notes that rewards for keeping the patch on can help, and a sticker or a small reward chart is an easy start. One caution: a loose pirate-style patch on an elastic band is not a good choice for treatment, because children peek around it. Ask the doctor which type suits the plan.

AAPOS also suggests that children may wear a patch better when allowed to watch TV or play video games with it on. The action: bring your child to the optical shop and the follow-up visit, and let them choose the design themselves.

When can the eye doctor change the plan?

Whenever the current plan is not being followed because of teasing, the doctor should hear about it. There are often choices. For amblyopia, the weaker-eye treatment may be done with a patch or with atropine drops that blur the better eye, which AAPOS lists as an alternative to patching. You can ask whether the hours, the timing in the day or the method could change. Which one suits your child is the doctor's decision, and it depends on the eyes and on the family.

For an eye that turns, the doctor can bring the next review forward, talk about the timing of any treatment and explain what each choice does and does not do. Parents said in the interview study that written information helped them hold on to what was said and share it with family, so ask for a summary you can take home. Squint and lazy eye in children: a parent's guide and the squint that comes and goes give the background.

Please do not stop or reduce the glasses or patch yourself, and do not make a deal with your child to wear them only at home without asking. A planned change keeps the treatment going. A quiet stop does not. The action: book a visit, say plainly that teasing is making treatment hard, and ask what could change.

Will surgery, or stopping treatment, end the teasing?

No one can promise that. Some children are teased about other things, and children who wear no glasses at all are also teased. Surgery to straighten an eye is done for the eyes and for how they work together, and it is explained in squint surgery: what happens on the day. Glasses may still be needed afterwards. The studies above cannot show that treatment causes teasing, only that the two have gone together in some groups.

What can be said is this: untreated amblyopia and a turning eye can affect how the eyes work, and treatment works only when it is carried out. Teasing is a problem to be solved at the same time, with your child, the school and the doctor, not a reason to leave the eyes untreated. If your child is low in mood or does not want to go to school, tell the doctor, your family doctor or the school counsellor as well.

The aim is a child who is comfortable enough to keep going. Talk, tell the school, choose the frame and patch together, and keep the doctor in the loop.

Tell the eye doctor sooner if your child…

Is hiding, losing or refusing the glasses or patch because of what others say.
Has stopped wearing the glasses or patch for more than a few days without the doctor knowing.
Is low in mood, avoids school or says they are being bullied: tell the school and your family doctor as well.
Has an eye that turns more often, or says the vision is blurrier when the glasses are off.
Suddenly develops a new squint, a drooping lid or double vision: go the same day.

Is this urgent? Today, this week or routine

Common questions

My child says classmates laugh at the eye patch. Should I stop patching?

No, please do not stop on your own. Tell the eye doctor what is happening, because the plan can sometimes be changed. AAPOS lists atropine drops that blur the better eye as an alternative to patching, and the doctor decides which suits your child.

Are children who wear glasses really bullied more?

In one UK study of 6,536 children, those wearing glasses at 7.5 years, or who had worn an eye patch, were 35% to 37% more likely to be victims of physical or verbal bullying a year later. This was a group finding after adjusting for social class and maternal education. It does not say what will happen to your child.

Is it the glasses or the patch that hurts a child's confidence more?

In one Australian study of 47 children treated for lazy eye, lower social acceptance scores went with a history of patching and not with glasses or a squint. Scores for schoolwork, sport, appearance and overall self-worth were similar to those of other children. It is a small study, so use it as a hint and not a rule.

What can I say to my child when they come home upset?

Listen first, then give them a short reply to use, such as 'These help me see.' Stay matter-of-fact and positive about the glasses or patch. Praise the effort of wearing them, and promise help if the teasing continues rather than promising it will stop.

Should I tell the teacher and the class?

Yes, usually tell the class teacher. AAPOS notes that school is often a good time for patching because teachers can help, and that it should not be a problem when everyone understands. Ask the teacher to remind your child to wear the glasses or patch and to tell you if teasing happens.

Can the frame or patch design make a difference?

It can make it easier for the child to agree. Let your child choose between a few frames that fit well, because a comfortable frame is more likely to be worn. For patches, ask the doctor which type suits the plan, and avoid a loose pirate-style patch on an elastic band because children peek around it.

Will squint surgery stop the teasing?

No one can promise that. Surgery is done to improve how the eyes line up and work together, and glasses may still be needed afterwards. Teasing is a separate problem to work on with your child, the school and the doctor.

References

Investigative Ophthalmology & Visual Science · Common visual defects and peer victimization in children (Horwood et al., 2005) · pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
Optometry and Vision Science · Effect of amblyopia on self-esteem in children (Webber et al., 2008) · pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
BMC Ophthalmology · Treating childhood intermittent distance exotropia: a qualitative study of decision making (Lecouturier et al., 2015) · pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
American Association for Pediatric Ophthalmology and Strabismus · Amblyopia · aapos.org
American Association for Pediatric Ophthalmology and Strabismus · Glasses for children · aapos.org

By Dr Chan Li Yen. General information only. It does not replace a consultation. If you are worried about your child's eyes or vision, please see an eye doctor.

My child is teased about glasses, a patch or a wandering eye: what helps